Ask Dr Sarah: Should I Meet Up With The Boy I Met On Holidays?

“This summer I went abroad and had a holiday romance with a boy. He said he would keep in touch, …

“This summer I went abroad and had a holiday romance with a boy. He said he would keep in touch, and we did for a while but things just fizzled out. Since I came home I can’t stop thinking about him and I want to see him again. He texted me recently and told me he is coming to Ireland but I don’t want to meet up, catch feelings and then never see him again. What should I do?” – Anon, 16. 

You say that you can’t stop thinking about him and want to see him again, but at the same time you don’t want to find out there’s nothing there and end up getting hurt. But honestly, how are you ever going to know where you stand unless you take a chance and see him again?

It might not work out, you might not feel anything, he might not feel anything, but at least you will know! The idea of a ‘holiday romance’ is well-known; a short-lived affair where are whole lot of emotions are packed into a couple of days. The romance seems perfect because you’re on holiday, the sun is out and you don’t really have time to get to know the person (and their flaws) that well.

Maybe ask yourself if you’re really afraid of being hurt, or is there a little piece of you that wants to preserve those perfect holiday memories? Some holiday romances do last and turn into longer-term relationships, and the fact that he got in touch and is coming to Ireland, suggests that maybe he has been thinking about your too!   If you’re genuinely into him, say yes and give it a chance.

Just as a precaution and because this is someone you maybe don’t know that well, make sure your friends and family know your movements and where you’re meeting him.

Check out our post on how to safely meet up with someone IRL.