Ask Dr Sarah: What Do I Do When A Friend Unfollows Me?

Dr. Sarah is always on hand to help.

Do you have a personal problem that you need help with? KISS are here to help, with Dr Sarah. A clinical child psychologist specialising in adolescent issues, Dr Sarah is always on hand to help.

“A friend of mine unfollowed me on Instagram last week, for no reason. We’re good friends, or I thought we were, and then I noticed that she is no longer following me. I’m not sure what I did to deserve it and it’s hurt my feelings and it makes me feel anxious because she clearly doesn’t like me any more. Should I ask her why or just leave it?”

Sarah, 16, Waterford

‘Leaving it’ and not confronting her is probably the easier option but you’ll still be left wondering what happened. ‘Leaving it’ also doesn’t give you the opportunity to try to sort things out. You could start by asking a mutual friend if they have any idea what is going on. You may have done something to upset her without realising it, or she may wrongly think you have done something.

If nobody has any idea what is going on, you could message her, but if that’s not possible, maybe pluck up the courage to speak to her directly. Have a think in advance about what you want to say and also think about the different things she might say back and how you will respond.

Unfollowing someone without an explanation is not how a good friend behaves, but maybe there is an explanation. Asking her and trying to sort it out may answer your questions, but you may have to accept that, for reasons you may never know, your friendship has come to an end.

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